The Hills: Season 4

I'm a devoted Hills fan, I won't deny it. I've been watching it since the very beginning, mostly because I can relate to it so much - moving to a new city, figuring out who your friends are, dating, getting your career started. The Hills is obviously annoying because it's set in the world's most enraging city (L.A.), but at least we can laugh at the stupid people along the way.

So I finally got the chance to see the season 4 premiere today, because on Monday I was out of town buying a puppy. Here are my thoughts:

Lauren - It's good that she's dating the new Doug guy so that Brody will be out of the picture. But he's obviously totally boring and shallow, just like her.

Lo - What an annoying, immature baby. She needs to stop being so mean to Audrina, and stop being so possessive of Lauren. It's so weird how she can't do anything without her precious L.C. by her side - you'd like it would get boring being the second banana. And what is her job, anyway? Is she going to school or something? It's like she never even does anything.

Audrina - I definitely like her, because she's just blowing Lo and Lauren off and not caring about staying in their stupid circle anymore. Just PLEASE stay away from Justin Bobby this season!

Whitney - Boring as usual. But kind of nice I guess.

Heidi and Spencer - Oh God. Why does she even put up with Spencer's antics? I don't understand why he would be so mad at her for letting her sister stay with them. Supposedly it's all just a scripted act for the cameras though.

Stephanie - Why does Lauren care so much about being her friend? She's obviously just a bitchy drama queen. I can't wait to see her stab Lauren in the back so that she'll stop getting airtime on the show.

I'll let you know my thoughts after tomorrow's new episode.

Feeding Your F--ing Family

In lieu of my last post, there couldn't be a better time to present to you this hilarious video segment by Sarah Haskins.

Target Women: Feeding Your F--ing Family

Housework and the Dreaded E-mail Forward

Last week, my mom sent me another one of her "hilarious" e-mail forwards, which she receives daily in mass quantities from her elderly, assumedly bored relatives. I would let you read the "joke" in its entirety if I still had the e-mail in my inbox, but in replace of the actual document, my stilted summary will have to suffice.

The e-mail contained the story of a man who thinks that his wife, who is a stay-at-home mom, "has it easy," and asks God to allow them to switch bodies for a day. God does so, and the man experiences a long day of demeaning household chores and back-breaking labor, which are meticulously listed item by item as they occur throughout the day. The final "job" on his list of chores is having sex, which he consents to, even though he is quite tired and would really rather skip it.

The next morning, the man wakes up and begs God for forgiveness, admitting that his wife does, indeed, work quite hard. When he asks God to switch them back, God responds with the knee-slapping quip "That's great, but you'll have to wait 9 months. You got pregnant last night."

That's supposed to be the punch line.

At the end of the e-mail, I was completely confused. Which part is the joke? That the man "learns his lesson" by realizing how much his wife does around the house? That he ends up getting pregnant at the end? Or that men's worst nightmare is to endure what women experience on an everyday basis?

To me, this "joke" is so very, extremely sad. Of course women have horrible lives. Of course society wants us to be domestic servants and sex slaves and baby makers. But you know it's getting bad when women's lives literally start to become an actual punch line. "At least you're not a woman! Then things would be really bad!" "Think you had a bad day at work today? Just be lucky you still have a penis, or your life would be as horrible as a woman's!"

Anywho, aside from the rage it incites, this "joke" does bring up an interesting feminist issue, which is that of household duties. Here's what I don't get - why does every single commercial selling some type of household cleaning product have to feature a woman? Why do cleaning commercials always joke about women having to clean up after their husbands, who are consistently depicted as witless clods? Yes, it's yet another insidious lie perpetrated by American patriarchal capitalism: Women clean because they're smarter than men! That's right ladies, even though your husband is a grown man with a college degree, he just can't seem to figure out how to wipe off a counter! That's why you need to do it, you clever, savvy woman you! Now get to that kitchen and maybe your husband will give you a cookie when you're done!